02/08/09 Run

This morning Michael and I went to church. We went to the early service. Our church is currently doing a sermon series on John 3:16. At first when I heard we were doing this series, I had a bit of a negative attitude about it. I was SURE that it was going to be a wishy-washy series on what God does for us, focusing on how He is here for us rather than us being here for Him. I am realizing a lot about myself in spite of my preconceived notions of how these sermons were not going to shape my holiness or convict me. I want to earn my way to God. I do. In light of my imperfections, I want to fix them. I can't stand the thought of standing before God one day and having a wasted life to look back upon. I want transformation, healing, and holiness to be more than evident in my life. I WANT to do the right thing. But, I guess in all these, more often than not, vain attempts to secure righteousness, I have mistaken living for Him as saving myself. I CAN'T save myself, no matter how hard I try. And there have been certain times in my life when I have been keenly aware of the fact. But lately, I have been trying to earn my way again. Why am I doing this? Lot's to think about. I talked to my Pastor a bit after the sermon, which I believe was a God ordained meeting. I was secretly wanting to ask him why he wasn't focussing more on "faith with works" instead of the "grace-talk" he was sharing with the congregation. He reminded me of 2 words that I have heard before and even know a little about them. They are "sanctification" and "justification". I am justified because I believe in what Christ did for me on the cross! I am sanctified in this life when I combine that faith with my actions. Justification is the gift that never changes. Sanctification can waver when I am not pursuing the things of God on a daily basis. So much to learn about this.

I know this is a running blog, but it's Sunday, and these have been my thoughts lately. I did run today. 7 miles. It was nice out, and I felt pretty good through most of the run. My lower back started to hurt a tad toward the end. That has never happened before. I hope I'm not overdoing anything.